Social Interaction Primary Pleasure

This topic has 34 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated March 14, 2010 at 9:28 am by TheLostOnes.

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October 22, 2009 at 9:28 pm #1209068
Tank Girl
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Right heres the babble as I’m not good as expressing what I want in a few words: hope it makes sense

another thing that I used to find really difficult was thinking about what others thought about me –
which made me very shy and unfortunatley come across as arogant to some,

I now think what I would do is often judge people and therefore think they thought like me and were judging me –

this isnt always the case I now know –

I began to be more open minded, and began to not worry about what other people – who I didnt even know and in some times didnt want to know- thought about me –

and begun to enjoy things alot more when I stopped trying to annalyse things / how I came across / what people thought about me etc, and just went out to have fun (and also that I’m not really that important)

fun is meant to be light hearted and welll…. fun :bounce_fl
October 22, 2009 at 9:29 pm #1209101
1984
Participant
@Tank Girl 357807 wrote:

I realised that my socail and personal interests had wained, and I joined an adult ed art class, I joined the local gym (and had to totally force myself intially to go) I started going out, got back into the party scene, back into my interest in the world at large and meeting new friends (unfortunatley daft was one :laugh_at:) and making sure I maintained contact with my ‘regular’ friends rather than waiting for them to contact me,

I’d say if you are finding small talk and social banter difficult maybe you need to try and find friends with similar interests to you who you can have deep and meaningful converstaions with and share an emotional bond with –

saying this – however if you are depressed this is very difficult to do, and you need the motivation to be able to go out and do this and some form of confidence or a good ‘mask’, but some times you need to bite the bullet and give it a go

Thanks Tank Girl that’s really useful, I think the point about depression is a good one. I just want to be “normal” so much I guess and not let it hold me back I just try and ignore it. And then wonder why I don’t interact and feel like a lot of other people seem to.

I think it will be small steps and a lot of work and hopefully in a years time I will be in a far better place. 🙂
October 22, 2009 at 9:31 pm #1209103
1984
Participant
@Tank Girl 357809 wrote:

Right heres the babble as I’m not good as expressing what I want in a few words: hope it makes sense

another thing that I used to find really difficult was thinking about what others thought about me –
which made me very shy and unfortunatley come across as arogant to some,

I now think what I would do is often judge people and therefore think they thought like me and were judging me –

this isnt always the case I now know –

I began to be more open minded, and began to not worry about what other people – who I didnt even know and in some times didnt want to know- thought about me –

and begun to enjoy things alot more when I stopped trying to annalyse things / how I came across / what people thought about me etc, and just went out to have fun (and also that I’m not really that important)

fun is meant to be light hearted and welll…. fun :bounce_fl

I understand and relate to what you are saying (guess who had therapy the other day lol). Not being judgmental and not assuming everyone else is constantly judging me is something I REALLY REALLY need to work on.
October 22, 2009 at 9:34 pm #1209069
Tank Girl
Participant
@1984 357810 wrote:

I just want to be “normal” so much I guess

dont forget we all wear masks!!!

either at home, at work, at school / college, with different social circles etc

and underneath these masks are often shy, quiet and vulnerable people who are desperatley trying to be liked, wanted, needed and loved

and self awareness is brilliant but sometimes these masks are needed to protect yourself in some situations too…..

must go to bed now ttfn :group_hug
October 22, 2009 at 9:37 pm #1209061
PhilKmorgan
Participant
Wow TG you should charge a fee..
October 22, 2009 at 9:40 pm #1209062
PhilKmorgan
Participant
@Tank Girl 357812 wrote:

dont forget we all wear masks!!!

either at home, at work, at school / college, with different social circles etc

and underneath these masks are often shy, quiet and vulnerable people who are desperatley trying to be liked, wanted, needed and loved

and self awareness is brilliant but sometimes these masks are needed to protect yourself in some situations too…..

must go to bed now ttfn :group_hug

This is really spot on..
October 22, 2009 at 9:44 pm #1209064
PhilKmorgan
Participant
Dont go to bed yet
October 22, 2009 at 9:46 pm #1209104
1984
Participant
@Tank Girl 357812 wrote:

dont forget we all wear masks!!!

Isn’t that from Batman? 😉

very true all of that *nods*
October 22, 2009 at 9:49 pm #1209065
PhilKmorgan
Participant
Whats the old saying, something like being 2 faced (or even n-faced) is a practical necessity….

Reminds me of The Salton Sea
March 14, 2010 at 9:28 am #1209081
GiantMidget
Participant
:bounce_ci
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