Forums The Vibe Chat Anyone else find themselves feeling really lonely?

Viewing 25 posts - 1 through 25 (of 45 total)
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  • #1055442
    Anonymous

    *sigh*

    giving up drinking, drugs and having mental health issues is hard sometimes.

    Don’t think I have left the house in a week.

    #1269887
    MC G-Tek
    Participant

    You need to force yaself to go out mate, I have a friend who very rarely leaves the house and is pretty much petrified of the outside world as a result – and humans are, on the whole, supposed to be social creatures. The sooner you break that cycle the better dude, all the best.

    #1269905
    Deez
    Participant

    Yeah mate you need to leave the house even if its just to go for a walk or something, it will help a lot.

    #1269863
    Anonymous

    yeah

    #1269878
    Gylfi Gudbjornsson
    Participant

    Just hop in the car go to the seaside for the day, some where nice like Dorset or maybe go to the natural history museum there loads to keep you intrigued. You’ll meet lots of cool people, and you’ll feel better for it. Chin up dude!

    #1269882
    Izbeckistan
    Participant

    I gave up drink and drugs for a year and bit and I was quite shocked how it completly changed my social life (so called mates eh)
    The great thing is that it opened up so many doors for me to things that the party life can distract you from (for me any way)

    Treat yourself ti a mountain bike or something and start up some out door hobbies maybe?

    #1269874
    p0ly
    Participant

    #1269880
    Mezz
    Participant

    No work = do more drugs

    No drugs = work harder

    No drugs or work = Serious boredom as most peeps you know will be working or sleeping off last nights high during the day

    I’d recommend doing some voluntary work

    1) Keeps you busy
    2) Meet new people
    3) Gets you back into a routine so you dont end up playing games / chatting on forums all night and sleeping half the day
    4) Benefits whatever charity you work for
    5) Gives you experience and references for applying for other jobs when your ready
    6) You decided how many hours you can deal with, lots of gratitude with no expectations or pressure

    Give it a go, nothing to lose by trying

    #1269870
    General Lighting
    Moderator

    @Izbeckistan 535200 wrote:

    I gave up drink and drugs for a year and bit and I was quite shocked how it completly changed my social life (so called mates eh)
    The great thing is that it opened up so many doors for me to things that the party life can distract you from (for me any way)

    Treat yourself ti a mountain bike or something and start up some out door hobbies maybe?

    Exactly what happened to me (though at least I already had the bike). Of course it isn’t always the best weather for a bike ride in the UK unless you want to also get a load of harsh weather gear and at the very least a decent cycling jacket and this isn’t cheap (I get mine from a workers co-op based up where Korno lives, on the presumption that if the Scots wear this stuff in their weather it will do the job (it does)).

    I am lucky that full time work actually allows me to balance working from home and getting outdoors but even so its not that abnormal these days for folk to spend a lot of time inside.

    But another thing I have noticed is that everyone is a lot more downtrodden these days since the economic depression, whether or not they have diagnosed mental health problems. Even if they socialise its now in a more competitive way. I don’t mean everyone is beating up each other (at least not outside townie clubs on drinking nights and in any case they get arrested before they do too much damage) but there are times when being “lonely” isn’t really half as bad as its made out to be. you can of course still socialise but on your own terms….

    #1269891
    eye.
    Participant

    @photographthesun 535179 wrote:

    *sigh*

    giving up drinking, drugs and having mental health issues is hard sometimes.

    Don’t think I have left the house in a week.

    I feel you man. I’ve been struggling extreme panic attacks recently and become a recluse. I forced myself to go out and deal with the panic I felt being around people and it’s really helped.

    #1269892
    eye.
    Participant

    As for the attacks I have thinking something’s wrong with me physically (whether I’m alone or not.) I’ve had to resort to benzos. It feels like the pussy way out but IDGAF.

    #1269893
    The Psyentist
    Participant

    I think we all get these phases from time to time dude. As others have suggested even if you don’t feel like it go out and get a bit of fresh air and exercise. Some endorphins will do you good.

    #1269903
    joksgez
    Participant

    yeah i know what you mean man, being in the house all day can make you feel really isolated. its good to just atleast go for a walk everyday so you get and get some fresh air and realise how much shit is going on outside the confines of your house. volunteering is defo a good idea as its good to get out and meet people. just remember that you might be stuck in a bit of a rut at the moment but you still have so much more exciting things to happen to you because life is an absolute rollercoaster and i hate to use the old cliche, but enjoy the ride!

    :bounce_b::bounce_b::bounce_b::bounce_b:

    #1269871
    General Lighting
    Moderator

    also with volunteering organisations are so desparate especially to find someone who can contribute, that essentially you can choose your own hours and times and how much commitment you make…

    #1269864
    Anonymous

    @Izbeckistan 535200 wrote:

    I gave up drink and drugs for a year and bit and I was quite shocked how it completly changed my social life (so called mates eh)
    The great thing is that it opened up so many doors for me to things that the party life can distract you from (for me any way)

    Treat yourself ti a mountain bike or something and start up some out door hobbies maybe?

    No money and a bit insular. I am job hunting and going to volunteer it will work out just one of those days.

    #1269896
    korno
    Participant

    At least set yourself a time of the day that you have to go out and take a walk around the park.. feed the ducks? Make it a set daily goal to get showered and dressed, prepare the breadcrumbs…
    At least get 30 minutes of Vitamin D every day, it is VITAL.

    #1269897
    korno
    Participant

    And yeah i get very lonely sometimes, i can go weeks without seeing friends cos sometimes i just want to chill out at the weekends with having worked so much, and occasionally I feel like the only like-minded people i associate with is you lot here, sometimes for a couple of weeks at a time.

    #1269865
    Anonymous

    @korno 535257 wrote:

    And yeah i get very lonely sometimes, i can go weeks without seeing friends cos sometimes i just want to chill out at the weekends with having worked so much, and occasionally I feel like the only like-minded people i associate with is you lot here, sometimes for a couple of weeks at a time.

    I can cound the number of friends I have on one hand. And I am missing a finger on that hand and dont count thumbs.

    Sorry to hear that Korno you seem like a really nice person. We should have more meetups then you will find more like minded folk.

    #1269879
    barrettone
    Participant

    Do you have any kind of routine for your day?

    It may sound a bit boring but I find that forcing myself to stick to some kind of framework can be very helpful. It’s nothing like a rigid schedule. I just tell myself “today I will spend at least 1 hour reading my book” or “I’m going to the gym 3 times this week.” By treating things like commitments rather than simply hobbies, I find more motivation to go through with stuff. The volunteer work you’re planning on doing is a great place to meet new people. A job is another good place. I mean it basically boils down to “go do stuff at places.” But of course always value your alone time too.

    Just try not to get too hung up about it.

    #1269898
    korno
    Participant

    Yeah i was pretty much getting at the same thing as barratone, set yourself simple tasks everyday, you gotta keep your mind and body together and sometimes can lose sight of that when sitting at the pc for long periods when you don’t have to do anything particularly.
    Do try your best to get even a small ammount fresh air through your brain daily, i can’t stress this enough, just a 30 min stroll through somewhere there’s not full of people aand cars.
    I’m ok photographthesun i do have plenty of like-minded friends around about me it’s just that work wears me out and so it’s my fault if i get lonely because i choose not to socialize enough.

    #1269872
    General Lighting
    Moderator

    I would not sell yourself short either. You have already conquered various health problems, dealt with a serious industrial injury and are still coping which a lot of others have not been able to do.

    also most volunteer groups actually want folk who have dealt with mental health issues as it is good for their diversity returns.

    #1269881
    Mezz
    Participant

    @General Lighting 535273 wrote:

    also most volunteer groups actually want folk who have dealt with mental health issues as it is good for their diversity returns.

    Also good to have people who understand the problems they face first hand to help others, people prefer to deal with other people like themselves, not some bloody graduate social worker who read about it in a book and dont know shit about the real world

    #1269866
    Anonymous

    @General Lighting 535273 wrote:

    I would not sell yourself short either. You have already conquered various health problems, dealt with a serious industrial injury and are still coping which a lot of others have not been able to do.

    also most volunteer groups actually want folk who have dealt with mental health issues as it is good for their diversity returns.

    thanks GL you have a good point

    #1269883
    Izbeckistan
    Participant

    I think I need to surround myself with better company 🙁

    #1269899
    korno
    Participant

    Why do you think that chick? Are you not happy in your circle of mates? 🙁

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Forums The Vibe Chat Anyone else find themselves feeling really lonely?