@Tank Girl 442754 wrote:

I guess again we have to agree to disagree

I hope I dont ever end up so pessimistic / unhappy that I cant ever enjoy simple things such as playing with my cat or appreciate the blossom on trees, or the fact I do not have a disease that impacts or gives me so much pain I cant walk or the fact I have (just) enough money to keep a roof over my head and enough food in my belly… these arnt luxuries these are great things to me

these are the things I am happy for

(I have experienced depression for approx a year and when I look back and reflect ( on my experience) was because I did nothing to help myself or do anything to change my situation – this isnt what I am suggesting is any where near close to the way you are feeling – but what I am trying to say is not everyones experience or out look is the same as yours )

*shrugs* I do enjoy things, I just think that the suffering often out weights the positive. People dont know how bloody lucky they are to be able to see the positive in the world to a point where they can enjoy life. I have never been anything but unhappy as long as I can remember. I have messed up my life so badly it seems unlikely I will be able to achieve anything of personal importance. And even now expressing this does nothing but isolate me further